school poem. video of me doing this coming soon

A

B
C

D

F

i don’t remember much from my childhood

but i still get an itching that i am missing a letter

it’s on the tip of my tongue...

but it doesn’t matter. these 5 letters define my character

A-Above proficient levels. fully grasps material.

B-Barely has trouble understanding the class.

C- Can do better. Average at best.

D-DUNCE! One step up from 1st grade vocabulary and 3rd grade understanding.

F- Failure. Try again next time. Go directly to jail. no re-do’s

My circle of life is limited to the 3 hole punches in my papers

I am sorry officer, but i can’t seem to find my registration

I guess i voided my return policy

i am just an appliance to you

they blocked some websites on my school computers. It screams:

“We can’t let you know there is an outside world

We can’t let you know life isn’t decided by that paper you didn’t spend the obligatory 5 hours on”

I broke the status quo and left the scatter plot of normal data as i refuse to be average anymore.

I want to be Excellent

I want to Ecstatic

I want to remember what comes after D but before F

i donate my life to the PTSA

may they use it well,

or throw one hell of a faculty party

I wish to state my intentions.

i am here to defy stereotypes

i want to exceed expectations and fulfill horror stories

I want to be different

I will raise my hand to ask questions

like “dear mr teacher:

Do you think if you cut my heart in half the biopsy would be as shiny as the apple on your desk

are my lungs meant for breathing or simply as a use for chokeholding me when needed

Do my eyes show the the same text from the books i read every night

copy them from paper to pupils to test”

i am just a pupil

a speck of dust collected on your diploma

as if it was a trophy that you survived where i am now, and have come back to make mine worse

sharpen pencils and call them number 2 to inspire competition

i remember the day that you let slip

that you didn’t know everything

i held onto it

hoping to one day best you so that i could....end up right where you are now.

“Mr teacher,”

I shake nervously

“what comes after the letter D again? I can’t seem to remember”

He replies “F of course”

And then i say. “No. before F. After D it Evades me.”

he is about to choke as if

trying to regurgitate guidelines

Do not let children know that there is more to life than grades.
The bell rings. I go to the library and take out the alphabet book...

It has 5 pages.

A-is for amazing

B-is for better

C-is for crestfallen

D-is for dumb

F-is for flunking. you never want to get an F.

I jolted forward and scream

E

E is for everything

E is for effort

I run to the main hall. and write E on every surface until the school officer asks “why”?

I smile wide and clever and say

“no. this is an E.”

...

he doesn’t laugh.

When asked what E stands for i answered Escape

E is an opportunity to leave.

but i promised i would defy expectations

so when i graduate. I will write F on my diploma which stands for FUCK THIS

and when my children are born i will teach them that F is just a letter

but E is a state of mind